News

Check this page for all updates.

3/30/24

Spring is here! I have created a brand new collection for the season of new life! My inspiration was failing me, though one of my past-selves gently reminded me that I have been spending too much time in the physical realm and should restore and recharge within the ordered womb of the digital ether, connecting directly with other souls through Facebook. This new collection draws inspiration from the beauty of nature and educational DOS games of the 90s (because who doesn't love a bit of nostalgia!). All new scents are listed in the Scent Library.

And introducing my first curated sample set, the Twee and Wholesome As Fuck set! These are some of my most popular fragrances, nothing but soft, enveloping, narcotic, addictive, pillowy, nurturing warmth. Like warm vanilla cashmere, or tiny floral parties and tea. How can it be an unhealthy shopping addiction when it feels so good? Including:

While spring means new scents, it also means some spring cleaning here at Salt & Clove. It is with a heavy heart that I must tell you all that I'm retiring the following scents: 

All remaining stock of the top 5 will be still be available by mentioning my bestie, Elon, on X. He will personally decant the remainder of your favorites and the rest will be dumped into the ocean to poison whales because there just wasn't enough demand for them. While these scents are going away, there are always new things on the horizon! 

1/21/24

Hey sexy besties! I've been edging to cake smashing porn all month to get myself in the correct headspace to create a brand new Valentines Day collection for y'all! This collection will feature 12 brand new, never before seen, extra sensuous perfume delights. Inspired by my own body, gas station confectionary and other aphrodisiacs, and courtship rituals of the animal kingdom. More info coming soon...

11/27/23

I hope everyone had a peaceful holiday, but we need to talk. After receiving so many comments and e-mails requesting the return of Spooky Silly Fruit Bat Sweater, I made SO much and was expecting it to fly off the shelf. But guys...its not selling at all and if you don't appreciate what I do for you, you don't deserve the new things I would have put in that shelf space. I don't know, maybe its because even if you say it's your favorite perfume ever in SoTD, you never write actual helpful reviews to help me sell my products. 

While we're on that topic, I don't want to hear any more complaints about the random $100 bills I threw into some larger orders and others got a sprinkling of cat hair or a fistfull of the earth that sustains me. I was just trying to do something nice! But if y'all want nothing, I can give you nothing.

xoxoxo <3 Cthulhu


11/26/23

It's cozy season! What better way to celebrate the holidays than by going into massive credit card debt purchasing our highy anticipated Yule release. We will be introducing some new additions, along with bringing back some old favorites. We are SO excited to announce that, in partnership with our amazing and talented besties, Rudy Guliani and Harvey Weinstein, we gace added even more flavors for you to choose from! Keep following for more updates!

Introducing...

And welcoming the return of...


9/14/23

Hello my spooky babies! I am back with a tiny little Halloween mini release! Each bottle is LE with an artisanal diffuser handcrafted from 100% organic cat hair. Due to the rare nature of the ingredients and special care put into each scent, every collectors bottle will be priced at $85. Happy spooky season!! I have more surprises to come!



3/31/23

Due to the failing health of my beloved Nintendo Switch, and the resulting effect on my own mental well-being, expect delays in shipment. We are still accepting orders and hard at work making new smellies for you, but when it comes to actually shipping anything...I cant even. Thanks to all my fans for their patience and love as I navigate this difficult time. Your patronage means the world to me and 'Tendy. 

3/25/23

Spring is here! It's like the earth itself is moistening with arousal! We've combined the pagan fertility rites with the ancient Jewish tradition of Passover and the memory of Christ's resurrection to bring you a delightfully unique collection! Release date TBD. New this year:


3/18/23

St. Paddy's Day collection comes down tomorrow, come get it!


3/10/23

Top o' the mornin' to ya! Spontaneous St. Paddy's Day release! I've been working hard on this one all week. Hope there's enough to hold you over until the big spring release!


2/20/23

Presidents Day Sale! These perfumes are only available today, once they're gone, they'll be as dead as the people that inspired them. 

2/15/23 

Snooze you lose, V-Day collection comes down tomorrow. However, you're all in luck! I am debuting a new one day only Presidents Day (2/20) themed collection. Here is a sample of what will be available:


2/2/23

Love is in the air! Take our your wallets my little cash bunnies, Valentines Day is here! This year, our V-Day collection is inspired by the Ancient Roman spring fertility festival in which young boys would slaughter a billy goat in a cave, strip naked, soak their clothes in the blood, then chase the town's unmarried women, trying to splatter their clothing with the goat's blood. To be soaked in blood meant good luck. Romance is in the air! Check out our upcoming smellies!


1/1/23

Happy New year! The Griftmas collection will be coming down tomorrow to make room for new collections! Get it while you can, otherwise someone else will and people on the internet will think it's cute to enable your shopping addiction and tell you to buy it for $200 on eBay. 

12/20/22

Announcing the return of our Griftmas collection, featuring 357 of your returning favorites and 165 new LEs, which were equally inspired by my own struggle with mental health and infomercials of the mid-90s. 


11/1/22

Last call for the 'Weener collection before it's taken down tomorrow.

10/21/22

Announcing all scents for our upcoming 'Weener collection. These are all one-off, extremely limited scents. They will never return. As always, I worked incredibly hard on each individual scent in the 26 days since the last release and definitely payed a lot of attention to the details and nuances of each one. Time to take out your candy bucket and get spoopy!